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How To Assist Your Gymnast Be Much less Destructive – Stick It Woman LLC

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How To Help Your Gymnast Be Less Negative - Stick It Girl Gymnastics Blog

Gymnastics is a tricky sport. However have you learnt what else is hard? Your gymnast’s resilience!

However having to be so robust comes with good and dangerous penalties.

First, your gymnast has discovered to deal with the difficult obstacles that come her manner as a result of she’s needed to endure many troublesome conditions. These may need been psychological blocks, abusive coaches, accidents, imply teammates, low scores, frustration over getting abilities, not transferring up ranges, or the rest that she has needed to battle with.

Then again, she’s seemingly discovered to be tremendous essential of herself. She expects perfection. She has excessive requirements and units massive targets. And when she does not meet these expectations, she’s onerous on herself.

You may praise her and he or she may brush it off and discuss what she did incorrect as a substitute.

Otherwise you may inform her how proud you might be of her effort and he or she may not obtain it effectively as a result of she’s not pleased with herself.

Whereas it may be irritating to see this disconnect between the way you suppose she ought to be feeling about herself and the way she’s actually feeling, at all times do not forget that your gymnast’s viewpoint is most necessary relating to her perceptions of herself.

Actually, one factor that gymnasts get caught on is a negativity bias.

The negativity bias is the tendency to discover destructive occasions extra readily and to dwell on these occasions.

This will trigger your gymnast to:

  • Bear in mind insults from her coach extra simply than reward
  • Take into consideration destructive issues extra continuously than optimistic issues (particularly issues like falling or getting damage)
  • Reply extra strongly to destructive conditions than to ones which can be simply as optimistic (i.e. hanging onto the lacking her bars dismount at her State meet versus remembering her first place end at each meet that season)
  • Dwell on her errors

Now a negativity bias is a pure response by your gymnast’s mind to her environment. She is hard-wired (as all of us are) to hunt out destructive issues so her mind can defend her. If it finds all of the negatives, it might probably then make a plan for find out how to get by way of these life-threatening conditions safely.

Whereas this survival mechanism was a mandatory a part of our evolution as people, it isn’t at all times useful in current day gymnastics. And it is particularly unhelpful when it retains your gymnast caught on specializing in all of the destructive issues that she does, her coach does to her, or that occur to her in gymnastics.

So what do you do in case you have a gymnast who is absolutely destructive on a regular basis?

Listed here are a number of ideas:

1. Keep in mind that your gymnast will generally tend to interpret suggestions in a destructive manner, even when it is constructive.

You possibly can inform your gymnast the 5 nice issues she did at a meet and point out the 1 factor you suppose she wants to enhance on (“Hey, perhaps should you level your toes extra, you may get a better rating.”) and he or she’ll dwell on the 1 essential factor. 

So when you may be tempted to present corrections or supply ideas for a way your gymnast can enhance, chew your tongue. She’ll get loads of corrections from her coaches. Allow them to do the speaking and provides her the constructive suggestions.

2. Validate her destructive emotions. Do not brush them off.

This may sound counter-intuitive, particularly should you’re attempting to get your gymnast to concentrate on the positives, however it’s really an necessary step in serving to your gymnast overcome her destructive emotions.

Whilst you may not need your gymnast to dwell on the negatives, validating her emotions will assist her transfer previous them extra shortly. 

With out realizing it, you may need to shortly change her mindset to the alternative of what she’s pondering:

  • “Oh it wasn’t that dangerous of a meet, sweetie”
  • “You probably did simply in addition to your teammates.”
  • “Coach is simply being coach.”
  • “You’ve got had worse scores.”

What this does not do, nevertheless, is inform your gymnast you’ve got heard her destructive emotions. You are shortly attempting to brush them underneath the rug so she does not dwell on them, however fact be informed she goes to dwell on them anyway. As a substitute, let her know you hear her disappointment. This can assist her transfer by way of her destructive emotions quicker.

3. Be a optimistic instance for her.

Let’s face it. All of us have destructive ideas and typically these ideas can come out within the phrases we communicate, each to ourselves and to our gymnasts. Being aware of your individual negativity bias and taking steps to actively grow to be a extra optimistic pondering particular person can present your gymnast will the function mannequin she wants.

Take a while to note your individual ideas. Do you dwell on the negatives too? Do you end up speaking about all of the issues that went incorrect as a substitute of the issues that went proper in your individual day-to-day life? Are you consistently complaining a few co-worker or relative? Do you discuss how unfair life is?

Whereas your day-to-day life may not relate to gymnastics, it is nonetheless a steady instance of the way you suppose and reply to totally different conditions. Ensure you’re utilizing each alternative to point out your gymnast how you might be working to beat your individual negativity bias.

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4. Set her up with the instruments she wants to vary her destructive ideas.

You possibly can inform your gymnast to be extra optimistic, you possibly can redirect her in direction of extra optimistic ideas, and you’ll be the instance she must see, however you possibly can’t change her ideas for her. That is one thing she must work on herself.

Some gymnasts are extra, ought to I say, “strong-willed” than others and have a tendency to concentrate on the destructive extra usually. As irritating as that’s, it is part of who your gymnast has been and it would take extra effort for her to vary her pondering. Make sure to assist her persist with attempting to actively change these ideas.

A method to do that is to set her up with the instruments she must work on build up this new talent set. A good way to do that is to enroll her within the Stick It Woman Academy, my membership group for aggressive gymnasts. She’ll get weekly LIVE trainings, pre-recording trainings, and worksheets to assist her develop her psychological abilities. These psychological abilities have to be labored on simply as a lot as her gymnastics abilities however sadly most gymnasts spend little to no time attempting to construct up their psychological recreation.

Whilst you cannot make your gymnast change, you possibly can perceive among the issues she must work on and direct her to the assets to assist her.

These embrace issues like:

  • Being conscious of and stopping destructive self-talk
  • Reframing her destructive ideas/state of affairs
  • Establishing new patterns of thought
  • Giving further consideration to the optimistic moments

One solution to get her began is to create a gratitude jar on your gymnast. You possibly can have her write in a single factor she is grateful for every day. Her “factor” does not need to relate to gymnastics if she does not need it to. However by doing this she is educating her mind to concentrate on the extra optimistic points of her life! You may even begin her with my 5-Day Gratitude Problem.


Listening to your gymnast be so onerous on herself is absolutely robust as a dad or mum. And once you discover that she appears to concentrate on all of the issues she did incorrect or all of the issues she wants to enhance, you may need to make all that negativity go away. However do not forget that your gymnast is hard-wired with this negativity bias (as are you) and that it takes time to re-pattern her mind to suppose otherwise. 

It is necessary that you just restrict the “corrections” you give your gymnast since she’ll seemingly dwell on the error should you level it out. Validate the destructive emotions she’s having (even should you do not agree with them) in order that she feels heard. Be a optimistic instance for her and present her the way you actively work to beat your negativity bias. And eventually equip her with the instruments she wants by setting her up with assist. 



When you or your gymnast wants assist, along with the assets under I additionally supply one-on-one teaching periods by way of Zoom.


Gymnastics Mental Block Guidebook for Parents - Stick It Girl


Useful Hyperlinks:


  • Free Downloads: Get free gymnastics downloads to assist your gymnast work on her psychological abilities in gymnastics.
  • Stick It Woman Academy: Enroll your gymnast in my membership group the place she will be able to be taught totally different psychological coaching strategies and get on a weekly LIVE name with myself and different aggressive gymnasts. 
  • Free Fb Group for Mothers of Gymnasts: Be part of this group to speak with different gymnastics mothers and get ideas for find out how to assist your gymnast navigate by way of the psychological ups and downs of gymnastics


Gymnastics Mental Coach Anna Kojac, M.Ed.


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